> The Navy found they had too many officers and non coms and decided to offer an
early
>
> Retirement bonus.
They promised anyone who volunteered for
>
> retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight
line
>
> Between any t****oints in his body.
>
>
>
> The officer got to choose what those t****oints would be.
>
>
>
> The first officer who accepted asked that he be measured from the top
>
> Of his head to the tip of his toes.
He was measured at six feet and
>
> Walked out with a bonus of $72,000.
>
>
>
> The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be
>
> Measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes.
He
walked
>
> Out with $96,000.
>
>
>
> The third one was a non-commissioned officer, a grizzly old Chief
who,
>
> When asked where he would like to be measured replied, 'From the tip
of
>
> My weenie to my testicles.
'
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> It was suggested by the pension man that he might want to reconsider;
>
> Explaining about the nice big checks the previous two officers had
>
> Received.
>
>
>
> But the old Chief insisted and they decided to go along with him
>
> Providing the measurement was taken by a medical officer.
>
>
>
> The medical officer arrived and instructed the Chief to 'drop 'em,'
>
> Which he did.
>
>
>
> The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of the Chief's
>
> Weenie and began to work back.
>
>
>
>
>
> 'Dear Lord!' he suddenly exclaimed, 'Where are your testicles?'
>
>
>
> The old Chief calmly replied, 'Vietnam.
